Thursday, November 01, 2007

2 Years Depression Free


This is a photo from this morning. I'm loving photos of clouds lately, and, as I was walking through the park, this moment with the sun, coming through the trees and the heavy grey clouds stopped me in my tracks.

I went to my favorite park - a place that over the last year has become the place I go to think, to pray, to meet with God. I've gone there in most of the moments when I most desperately needed to process, to think, to sort things out, to journal, to pray.

I went there this morning because today, November 1, 2007, I am celebrating two years depression free. I took the day off work today, and I am celebrating with a retreat day, a day to rest, to restore, to catch up. Two years ago today, I had one of the most incredible encounters of my life, walking around a neighborhood in a blizzard, and sitting in the dark in a dear friend's car. That night, out of desperation, after seven years of depression, many of those full of moments where I quite simply wanted my life to end, I let my friend do what he'd been asking me to let him do for much of the previous year. I let my friend lead me in front of Jesus. And though we never directly asked for healing, something changed, and (though it took me three months to fully believe it) Jesus took my depression, and I've been depression free ever since.

So today, I'm celebrating. I'm hanging out with Jesus. And I started in the park. This has been a day filled with simple moments. No major, profound encounters, just the knowledge of the presence of Jesus, and a heart filled with joy.

This is me, at the park this morning. I bought a camera this week, and it has this great feature that lets me see the picture of myself I'm taking, while I'm taking it.










This is the spot, by the creek that I often sit in. It's also the spot, where, one morning about a month ago, I went wading. I built an altar in this spot about a month ago too. It's my spot - I go, I talk to Jesus there. That's what I did this morning, too. I went, I talked to Jesus. I wanted to say thank you. I threw a few stones, took a few photos, and simply soaked in the knowledge that two years ago my life looked really different.



Today is about celebrating and saying thank you. Later tonight I'm leading a Bible study, and I'll serve them my favorite cake (which I bought last night). They don't necessarily need to know what we're celebrating (though if they ask I'll tell them), but I want to celebrate.

Tomorrow I'm headed out of town for the weekend. To see Jason Upton play a conference. To be with dear friends. To get my nose pierced. To continue the celebration.